Things that used to be cool but aren't any more make me sad.

Upon reading a Vanity Fair article on Esquire magazine in the late 1960s, and being blown away especially by the cover design, I began to wonder why I had never considered reading the publication as it exists today.
Then I realised that it was probably because nowadays they put out bullshit covers like this:
And again:

Guys, it was cool when Angie Dickinson did it:
But have you ever heard of beating a dead horse?
Oh, and they also recreated the sensational Virna Lisi shaving shot (above) using Jessica Simpson, but I'm not letting it anywhere near my blog.

Toodle Pip.

I am going away for one month. Goodbye.

America's Sweetheart

Frockwriter tells me that Courtney Love is the new face (or legs... whatever) of Superfine jeans and that's all the excuse I need to do her a little fashion time-line.

I don't know if this is before or after Courtney wore white satin Versace to the Oscars. Weirdly enough, she apparently had hordes of designers trying to get her to wear their wares. There is a whole section on it in Bronwyn Cosgrave's awesome gossipy book on Academy Awards fashion Made for Each Other.

At the Oscars with the awful Amanda de Cadenet (baby mamma to Nick Valensi of The Strokes).
Like me, Courtney seems to have a bit of a thing for pointe shoes.

She recently made a massive boo boo when she was caught wearing fake Chanel (at the time she was photographed the dress had not even been in stores.) Lucky for Love it paid off and she got a pretty neat apology-spread in Harpers:

Take me to Toledo

Photo from FabSugar
Let me begin by saying I LOVE Michelle Obama for wearing Isabel Toledo to the presidential inauguration. Plus the colour combination of the lemon lace and green leather gloves is sensational. I'm a bit bummed to admit, however, that I'm not a fan of those jewels for day-wear and I'm not sure the dress really showcases Toledo's extraordinary talent for tailoring. But let's not end on a sad note. Here are Toledo and her husband, Ruben, having a gay old time:

Happy inauguration Y'all!

I demand satisfaction, SMH.

A week or so ago the Sydney Morning Herald printed a Best and Worst dressed list that left me more than a little TO'd. Apart from being horrendously boring (Kate Moss a style icon? No Way! I haven't heard that one before.) it was also inaccurate. Placed on the worst dressed list (a problem in itself), Michelle Obama was derided for the volcanic eruption-like, 'H&M' dress she wore on election night. In fact the dress was a Narciso Rodriguez creation, though Obama did wear a striped H&M dress, shown above, during the campaign.
If it wasn't bad enough that a fashion writer misidentified one of the most recognizable dresses of the year, SMH then didn't publish my extremely witty letter of complaint. (What's that you say, SMH? A crayon drawing of a sad face doesn't count as wit anymore?)
Ok, I'm going to take off my cranky pants and ranty robe now. I bid you goodnight.

You've got something on your, er...

The winds of change are blowing - it really is about time we started moving away from long necklaces, and what better way to ease the transition than to wear a bib/collar piece like this one, US$48 from Paleorama

There's also this from ineedtobuythisnow on ebay:

I think I wouldn't like it if the metal was silver but it's actually gorgeous white enamel.

Yum yum.

Bambi says hi.

This necklace is US$24.99 from the delightfully named Etsy store, Caca Cake.

I do, I do, I do, I do, I do.

Getting married? Well, as I see it, you have two options: first you could go the way of Wallis Simpson, the most stylish abdication-causing, Nazi-sympathising, divorcee-turned-duchess around. She wore Mainbocher to her naughty nuptials in 1937, and if I've ever seen a more subtly beautiful dress in my life, I can't think of it now.


Conversely you could take as your inspiration the dress worn by Stephanie Seymour in the Guns N' Roses' November Rain video.
Because nothing says commitment like an exposed bridal garter and puff-ball sleeves.

Mondo

You know what I think is really cool right now? Planet Earth. Not in an environmental kind of way, but more like a United Nations aesthetic, if you know what I mean.

LOOK AT THESE FABULOUS NECKLACES.

They're by Kali Arulpragasam (MIA's sister) for her label Super Fertile.

And on second thoughts, environmental chic isn't all bad. Here is Ksubi's sad earth t-shirt:
- though I think I would have preferred it if there was a speech bubble coming out of the Earth's mouth saying 'Don't tread on me'. If you know that pop culture reference, you deserve a biscuit.

It's just jenga.

I'm not sure how appropriate this t-shirt was for playing a game of jenga (it's a little distracting to say the least).

... is it Jeremy Scott? I don't know. Here's another:

EDIT: sarahjane, whose blog Fashion Polaroid is full of luscious sartorial yum yums, tells me that the sex-tee is actually Ksubi. Oy vey, I should have known.

Get Yer Ya Yas Out

Another day, another intensely irritating rant from Fred Niles, and this time he hates breasts (kind of.) This comes at the worst possible time for me, as just today I was noticing the number of topless men walking along Glebe Point Rd, none of whom drew a second glance. Personally I would probably never feel comfortable going topless on the beach let alone on a sidewalk - but that in itself pisses me off.
The whole thing makes me think of Zia McCabe of the Dandy Warhols, who used to perform topless on stage:She later said in an interview:
'...all the guys in the mosh pit with their shirts off looked like they were having so much fun. It seemed natural once I made the transition to the stage that when I got all hot and sweaty and I was in the moment that I should take my clothes off. But it got turned around on me and people were asking if I was a feminist or exhibitionist. I didn’t have a motive! Then it just wasn’t fun anymore because it took so much more for me to get caught up in the moment.'

Maybe I'll take a leaf out of Siouxsie Sioux's book, and make baby steps towards full blown public indecency:

Or maybe I'll just buy this Urban Outfitter's T-shirt, which bears no relation to any social issue whatsoever.

sometimes i think i was born backwards

This is Kaya Scodelario who played Effy on Skins, and while this photo shoot is beautiful, I SO do not approve of the cigarette (she would have been 16 at the time). In fact, she may have just beaten out Taylor Momsen for the age-inappropriate styling award.

Break My Body

A story did the rounds a while back, about Stella McCartney designing a necklace with a leg pendant in order to piss off her then stepmother, the one-legged Heather Mills. However, I'm not convinced that the whole thing wasn't a bunch of hooey, given that I've never been able to find an actual photo of the said necklace.

Anyway, I'm using this bit of 'news' as an excuse to showcase several necklaces that have body-bits on them.

First up a leg necklace that actually does exist:

From Caja Jewelry

Next, this mustache I've been jonesing for ages (in my book mustaches count as a 'body bit'.)

From Little Angels Jewelry

And the pièce de résistance:

From Vivienne Westwood, of course.

Sasha Pivovarova looks like other people.

But don't mention it around her, or she'll stab you with one of her cheek bones. 

Shocking.

It was a pleasant surprise to discover that Dean's in Kings Cross is not only a place for hip drunks to putt putt, but also acts as venue for the display of modern art.

Meet Pandora and her creator/ pimp, Humpadick Pimpernipple III:

If you treat Pandora with the respect she deserves, tequila ejects from her mouth, and water from her lady-zone (I might have got the orifices mixed up, my bad.)

And should you fail to display adequate reverence for the wire woman (and note, this includes trying to engage with her in doggy-style intercourse), well...

You gonna get zapped, son.

I shit you not, she's fitted out to send a mild electric current into the fool who don't treat her right.

Party til you Puke

This guy and his friends shouted something about who the girl on his t-shirt was, but to me the face is a dead ringer for Andrew WK on the cover of his album I Get Wet (just minus the nose bleed, though that's nothing a Vodka Grenadine couldn't fix):

Lovecats

Could these Kings Cross felines be any more adorable? Meow.

2008 AFI Awards: Maeve Dermody

Maeve, to be honest I would have no knowledge of your existence were it not for the fact that my parents apparently knew yo mama, back in the day. Whenever there is mention of you in the papers they gather round and shriek 'It's Maeve! Maeve Dermody!'. Luckily you dress beautifully and I now I feel I can take part in the ritual. Maeve!

2008 AFI Awards: Kat Stewart

Perhaps this dress gets a little fussy with the different fabrics but the futuristic structure is awesome and definitely cool enough for the woman who made bogan gangsters loveable.

2008 AFI Awards: Emma Lung

Upon seeing these pictures of Emma Lung I was reminded of the girl in Singing in the Rain who, in a swoon of admiration for Lena Lamont, noted 'She's so refined. I think I'll kill myself'. Right now I totally know how that girl felt, and if Harper's Bazaar know what's good for them, they'll be a giving Emma a cover soon.